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Step 11: Embrace the Unpredictable During and Beyond Divorce

By Karen McMahon

Embracing the unpredictable allows for a momentous shift. It allows you to reroute 
the energy you are currently expending in resisting and fearing change towards managing the present in the healthiest possible way so you will have the healthiest possible outcomes.  

This shift is no small feat yet the confidence and increase in calm it results in changes the game completely and gives you real power in influencing the outcome of both your divorce and your life.  It is possible to embrace the unpredictable, to accept it as your opportunity to become the director of a new and rewarding life as an outcome of journeying through this strange and unfamiliar territory.  

It is always a strange and unfamiliar territory when unpredictability rules. Whenever what we thought was so turns out to be not so, when the comforts we took for granted are threatened and seriously diminished we enter a time of unknowns. It can be a personal/familial experience like divorce, a collective experience like a local or national disaster, or a global experience like a pandemic.  

The insecurity of being thrust into a quickly changing environment without knowing what your resources are or will be or how it will change your world, your relationship with your children, or your view of yourself, creates an initially overwhelming experience of anxiety. This anxiety is inevitable, whether we considered ourselves highly proficient at managing life or not. Anxiety in such situations can co-exist with adapting to change in ways that are both positive and productive.  

When anxiety and adaptation coexist they lead to evolution. Divorce is a setup for personal evolution if you choose to interact with it this way. The alternative is a devolution into bitterness, resentment, anger, and an overall impoverishment of life. This second route is well worth rerouting away from.  

In order to adapt to massive change in a healthy manner it is necessary to entertain the possibility of positive outcomes, even if, for the time being, positive outcomes are impossible to imagine. Divorce need not mean eternal doom and gloom. Divorce can and does result in healthy, happier individuals and families for many of the clients we work with. How you navigate divorce determines if it weakens or strengthens you and your children!  


You know that on the other side of this experience you will emerge happier, with a closer relationship with your children, and able to have an even more rewarding life.  Would you be able to not only accept the anxiety, the changes, the pain, but also embrace the unpredictable for what it was ushering in for you?

Embrace the unpredictable for your personal growth and the best possible outcome for you and your family as it reconfigures itself.  Play a proactive and positive role in influencing your future.  

If you are not sure how to accept and eventually embrace the unpredictable reach out to us and schedule a FREE Rapid Relief Coaching Call.  Working with us could make the difference you are looking for.


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