By Lisa Brick
How possible do you think it is to be in a relationship where you listen and are listened to, intimacy and freedom exist simultaneously, where the sex consistently blows you away, and your partnership is so rewarding you experience it as a privilege?
It is. As an acupuncturist and relationship coach I have observed a myriad of relationships, most troubled yet a few that are wonderfully peaceful, loving, fun, and supportive. I call these infinitely successful unions “co-independent relationships”.
A co-independent relationship is one in which in both parties understand that to be truly happy and fulfilled each individual must be true to and manifest his/her nature while supporting the other to do the same, in a climate of respect, appreciation, and love. The participants are free from the need or desire to control, non-judgmental, and clear on their goals and objectives while flexible on how to reach them. Co-independency guarantees that you will continue to support yourself in attracting, creating, and nourishing the perfect life partner and playmate.
Listening skills – the ability to listen to another from their perspective, suspending your own temporarily to make this possible
Inquiry skills – the ability to ask questions that better help you and the speaker to understand the how, what, and why of his/her perspective or desire
Porousness – the ability to be open to receiving information that will expand your perspective
Clarity – to know what the how, what, and why of your perspective or desire
Acceptance – for yourself and others to follow what’s deeply important beyond compromise
Speaking skills – the ability to acknowledge and validate the person you have listened to and share your perspective and desires in a supportive and respectful manner
Patience – for the process of integration (of perspectives)
Awareness – are you capable of engaging in relationship this way and if not, what, where, and how can you up your skills?
Co-independent relationships are real and possible. When you’re ready to totally enjoy and appreciate your relationships, hire one of our coaches and start training. Build it and clear, compassionate, powerful, creative, fun, sensual, and loving individuals will come and stick around!
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