What's Your Story? A Guide to Rekindle Confidence

 
“Stories are the only enchantment possible, for when we begin to see our suffering as a story, we are saved.” – Anais Nin

 

You are powerful beyond your comprehension. You are also perfect, contrary to what you have been told or may think. Now, what stories have you been creating your experience of life out of?

You are weaving the fabric of your life from these stories...

  • It’s a dog eat dog world.
  • Men are from Mars, Women from Venus.
  • Those who get ahead are lucky.
  • My background set me up for failure.
  • The world is a dangerous place.
  • Everyone is out for themselves.
  • I’m not smart.
  • I’m not talented.
  • Life sucks and then you die.
  • If it can go wrong it will.
  • I married the wrong person.
  • My kids, spouse, parents, disease, boss, world, etc. are holding me back.

 

If you are lacking confidence in yourself, look at the story you are writing about you and your circumstances.

If the stories are not benefiting you, change them. BE CAUSE consciously. You are powerful beyond your comprehension. Once you get clear that you are ready for a new story, use the pathway below to deconstruct the old and create the new.

Mindfulness – What story have I been living out of? Choose one story at a time.

Inquiry – What evidence have I gathered to reinforce this story? Your evidence is as biased as your story.

Focus – What am I feeling as a result? How do my behaviors reinforce my story? What results are being created?

Reframe – What story do I want to be living out of? Begin writing this new story in your mind and begin living as if it were true because it will be, gathering one shred of evidence at a time, however small. Repeat above with each story that is causing you suffering.

 

If you think this is too simple you are telling yourself a story; ”My problems are too complex and real for this stupid, insensitive, annoying message.” If you are angry you are telling yourself a story; “Whoever is writing this doesn’t understand what I have been through and is insensitive and cruel.”

 

Your freedom is more important to me than your story. I feel empathy for your suffering. So much so, I am willing to have you be angry and challenge the presence of the door I am showing you. Get angry. Notice how attached you are to your story, how willing you are to defend it. You will fight for it, even die for it.

 

You are powerful enough to change your story. Here’s the story of one person who did.

 

Jules had dropped out of two schools. For the past year had spent most of his time in his small apartment on his computer surfing the web, checking out the great stuff everyone else on Facebook was doing, visiting porn sites, and feeling depressed. Friends and family were telling him he was wasting his life. Didn’t he know it! One day he ventured out and found himself with a stranger sharing his story.

 

Remarkably, the stranger had an entirely different take; “Congratulations, what wisdom!” said the stranger. “Rather than forcing your way forward on a path that obviously was not inspiring you, you’ve allowed yourself to stop and retreat to the cave. What would be worth coming out of the cave for? What would be worth attempting and even failing at if it offered you the possibility of success if you kept at it?”

 

In the light of the stranger’s perspectives Jules saw himself as wise, not wasteful, the cave as a valid place of retreat, and failure as part of the path towards accomplishing something he determined is of real and significant value. Jules asked himself the stranger’s questions. He went back to school, at first taking one course. He threw himself into it, put in the effort and succeeded this time.

 

After a series of unusual and unpleasant events, throughout which his new self acceptance, appreciation, and goals determined his choices, he moved to a new city with friends, enrolled in college full time and is pursuing his new empowering story of self.

 

In all fairness, there were other conversations with the stranger, reinforcing Jules’s power and capabilities. The stranger was a coach. The story is true.

“Great stories happen to those who can tell them.” – Ira Glass

 

If you are the author of a 'nightmare' story about your present and future and want to work on rewriting your story (and believing in the better version), sign up for our Rapid Relief Call and rekindle confidence in who you are and what you are capable of! 

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